3 posts tagged “wine”

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The Search for America's Top Bartender (a reality show you can drink)

Nov 18, 2008
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LXTV's On the Rocks: The Search for America's Top Bartender (a reality show you can drink)

We’ve become accustomed to reality TV shows where contestants are forced to drink worm juice. Disgusting – right? They didn’t even add any vodka before they smashed up those critters! We’re glad to see that LXTV has stepped up and given us the reality show that we’ve been waiting for: On the Rocks - The Search for America's Top Bartender. The contestants on this show know to mix their bug-tini using Absolut Peppar for an extra special kick. Take that Joe Rogan.

The show – filmed at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas – is viewable online in sprightly webisodes. Each of the filmed challenges goes down like the perfect martini. They are light, fun, and leave you wanting another. We sometimes enjoy the “food-oriented” reality shows that are so popular these days, but they can be trying. Do you really want to watch a bunch of egocentric, yapping chefs cook a mini-eggroll over the course of 55 minutes? Cut to the chase – we would have scarfed that measly appetizer 40 minutes ago with our first round of drinks.

On the Rocks (so far) keeps it under 10 minutes. These bar folk know what we want to see – alcohol being creatively poured, attractive people drinking it, and someone getting their ass sent home. Not to mention the judges. A motley crew, they sure seem to enjoy sipping-on those drinks. In the first episode, nightlife impresario Fabrizio Brenza proved that his standards are in the right place. He seemed to love every drink put in front of him (even the empty glass), and added some professional insight: “the color of the drink looks good, she (the bartender) looks really good.” Sip. “Did I mention that she looks really good?” Finally, a reality show with a proper judging system.

While the show was filmed in Vegas, we still have some hometown bartender heroes to root for. Contestants Trevor (currently at 230 Fifth) and Jovino (Hanger Bar) survived the first cut. As the show’s catchphrase goes – their drink is being refilled – and we hope they represent Drunktown in the weeks to come. We’re not sure how they’ll end up faring, as we suspect that Fabrizio may like some of the other bartender’s “color” better.

You can check out the episodes and news about the contestants here: lxtv.com/ontherocks.We will be keeping tabs on them to see who gets the dreaded “this was your last call”. We know it must be sad for them to head home, but to us it’s strangely comforting. For the next 12 weeks, it’s nice to know that we won’t be the only one getting flagged.

The Eldridge: Why's everyone bitching about Matt Levine?

Sep 4, 2008
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Review: The Eldridge

Champagne Sorry folks, we’re just back from a visit to The Eldridge, and Matt Levine is most certainly not a douche.

The lounge has caused a lot of griping, even before it started admitting guests. Owner Matt Levine set it off with an arrogant seeming interview he gave to New York Magazine, and the bloggers have been in a tizzy ever since. Brandying the word “douche” about as if it were Mr. Levine’s widely known nickname, the unhappy online folks have been twittering about the ultra-exclusive nature of the club, the price of the drinks, the champagne bottles lining the walls, and even Levine’s appearance on a VH1 reality show.

We found two examples of the group think that surrounds The Eldridge (posted as comments in this piece by Mr. Levine on Eater) - . 1. If it's so "intimate" why does this tool keep flapping his gums about it, just open your douchebar and shut up 2. Matt Levine is truly the biggest piece of garbage the city has to offer.

Once again, those who comment on blogs prove to possess the height of eloquence.

Never one to believe the cyber buzz – Barfly headed over to The Eldridge to see if the place really should be burnt to the ground for even daring to exist or if the negative nellys of the blogosphere are just complaining because its too shiny for them (hint – washing ones hair more than twice a week might make the shininess less overwhelming).

After a few deliberative cocktails – we came to a verdict. There is not that much to hate in The Eldridge, in fact – there is plenty to enjoy. The attention to detail that has clearly gone into the room stands out – it’s a small space but they’ve gotten a lot out of it. The intimate banquettes will surely make for some healthy mingling at parties (considering you’re able to get in).

And, we’re happy to see that the focus is clearly not on bottle service. An extensive (and delicious) cocktail list, delectable chocolates, intricate Absinthe table service – there is plenty going on here that is far and above schlepping a bottle of Grey Goose to a table of thirsty lawyers.

Yes, the door policy may be super strict, but years ago when Bungalow opened and started it all – this was an exciting thing. We remember the thrill of super-exclusivity, and although we might not agree with the price point, it is far superior to the current trashy mayhem that waits outside the other doors in the city (where the only card required for entry is an American Express).

We hope that Mr. Levine sticks to his strict door, and that it doesn’t just become another marketing ploy to draw the dodders over from Brooklyn in 6 months when things relax. As for all of the bloggy criticism – Barfly feels that it is undue. These same folks sing the praises of other intimate venues like PDT but because of Mr. Levine’s press presence, they have massacred his place. The difference between the venom being spewed at The Eldridge and the praise that surrounded the early days of Bungalow is easy to see.

Back when Bungalow opened – blogs didn’t exist. A club could open, an owner could give a few interviews, and people would be excited at the chance of getting in. Imagine the horrible things that would be left as “comments” if Ms. Sacco participated in the interweb in the early (and far superior) days of West Chelsea.

Now, say a few too many words about Armand de Brignac champagne, and forever you’re a douche. Well, Barfly disagrees. Douches don’t come to places like this, and they certainly don’t drink something as glorious as sparkling rose. We wish the Eldridge luck, and will certainly be back soon.

Review: The Eldridge

Cocktails – 4 olives – After many nights of drinking, we appreciated the protein that was in The Ludlow, a drink made with egg-whites.

Space – 4 olives – The champagne on the walls, the bar tucked away in the corner, the engraved wooden menus – it all works. It is on the small side though – which gives Barfly an idea. We are pleased to announce that the next super swanky exclusive club is going to be in our 1 bedroom apartment. Details to come.

Online whining – 1 olive – Really – we have better things to do. Like go to The Eldridge.

Drunktown Definitions

Aug 19, 2008
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Drunktown Definitions: You may not be able to drink the dictionary, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try.

Gentle reader – we’ve been spending so much time on enunciation (please – stop – we know where the goddamn rain falls already) that an integral part of the Sophisticate’s Guide has been neglected. Yes, we’re talking about vocabulary (drunken synonym: vocabbuuualarrry). You may slur it, but you’ll still have to use it. How else are you supposed to impress people into buying you free martinis? Ha – your looks? Indeed – when you’re memorizing the dictionary, be sure to look up uncomely and pie-hole (as in ‘your’).

We’ve taken the liberty of fleshing out some drunk-speak to get you started. While you fill-in some flash cards, we’re off to get free drinks. Don’t be jealous - it’s not our fault that our pie-hole happens to be pulchritudinous.

Ripped – (adj.) –A state of supreme drunkenness in which the intoxicated party tries to tear clothing off of both themselves and others in the room. In the case that they are already naked and there is no one else in the vicinity, the individual may start to savage newspaper, curtains, or any other material that they might mistake for the dreaded “commie in the corner.”

Origin – Greek – Originally used as a musing on the state of a hung-over citizen: “Oh shit, you must have had quite the night at the bacchanal, thine toga got ripped.”

Uses: 1. I can’t wait to get ripped tonight –lovely girl in the corner just wants me to tear her clothes off. 2. Dude – why is your grandmother’s bible all like, in pieces? We must’ve been RIPPED bro!

Gin blossoms – (n.) – The broken blood vessels on an elderly drunk’s cheeks and nose, a symptom of years of alcohol abuse. Also known as that crap on that old guys face.

Origin – Anglo-Saxon – During the Victorian Era, genteel women used to splash gin on their cheeks to add color. When they obtained the perfect hue, they were refereed to as ‘blossoms’. If they actually drank the gin and showed the signs of drunkenness, they were committed to the asylum and treated for hysteria.

Uses: 1. A jolly old man arrives at your dinner party – “Well, I didn’t have time to stop for flowers, but I (motions to face) brought Gin Blossoms! You have sherry, right?” 2. “I feel so horrible about these gin blossoms on my face. It’s so embarrassing. Did they really have to be named after such a shitty band?”

Hair of the Dog – (n.) – A hangover cure, taken the morning after a hefty bender. The drink must be alcoholic to balance out the withdrawal going on in your system. Usually a Bloody Mary, or another 16 beers.

Origin – 1920’s U.S.A. – Prohibition is raging, and so are the hangovers. A snake-oil salesman actually convinces his patients that the cure lies in the newfangled medicine of ‘licking the nearest dog on the back’. For this he charges $3, plus the $20 he takes in for the bathtub gin that is used to wash the dog-taste out of the patient’s mouth. Works every time!

Uses: 1. “Ugh – I just woke up on the bathroom floor with blood all over, and my wife’s dead body is in the tub. I need some hair of the dog.” 2. “Come on Rover, you can come out from under the porch, daddy just wanted some Hair of the Dog, we swear.”